My Best Friend

One spring several years ago, a friend of mine was preparing to move away. Our friendship had been spiritually profitable and edifying, and I considered it to be perhaps the best friendship I had ever had. My friend took a couple of short preliminary trips prior to her permanent departure, and I was surprised at how hard those precursors to her departure were for me. They made me face the reality that my friend would be leaving, and I struggled deeply over the coming change. It bothered me that the situation bothered me so much. How could a single person make that much difference? How could the “loss” of a friend be so devastating?

I was brought to consider this question: Who is my best friend? Christians have learned to say automatically, “Jesus is my best friend,” and in many ways, that is true whether we realize it or not. On the other hand, that pat answer is often just that – an expected answer that we have learned to give, but without any real conviction or actual assurance that it is true. It is an instinctive and automatic answer, but not always a sincere or authentic one. At least that is how it seemed to be in my life.

I recognized this as a problem. Jesus should be my best friend. I should be fully convinced of that in my heart, and it should make a difference in my life. What was I to do about this weakness? As a teacher, the entire summer vacation stretched before me. I was working part-time, with hours set at my own discretion, so I had plenty of time. I resolved to spend that time with God for a very specific purpose. I wanted to grow in Him and get to know Him better. I began to pray that God would become my best friend by summer’s end.

It was a wonderful summer. I spent many hours in the Bible, studying topics and books. It was exciting to spend days and weeks deep in the Word to an extent that I had never done before. I was amazed at the things God opened up to me. I learned and grew and came to appreciate this special relationship with my God. At the end of the summer, I asked myself the question, “Has God become my best friend?” I found the question difficult to answer, because I was challenged to define exactly what that meant or what it would look like. Of one thing I was sure, however; God was a better friend to me than He had been at the beginning of the summer, and probably than He ever had been before in my life. At the very least, much progress had been made, and I was on the right path. That was enough to satisfy me that God was at work to answer my prayer.

Several years later, in the midst of health challenges and unemployment, the thought suddenly came to me one day, “God is my best friend.” By this time, I was sure of it. When had the change happened? And how? I’m not sure I know the answer. I don’t think there was a single date on which the transition was made, nor do I think there was a single event that brought the change. As I had continued to pursue God and desire a closer relationship with Him, He had given His blessing. Some of that growth came through continued time in His Word, and some of it came through the difficulties and challenges God had brought into my life.

I had previously wondered what it would look like for God to be my best friend. Maybe I still can’t completely define that, but over the years there are some things I have realized. Anyone that is so near to me and goes through difficult times with me so faithfully is a good friend indeed. When others forget or neglect me, God is always there. When I feel unloved or unlovable, God assures me of His deep love. Spending time with Him can cheer and comfort me like nothing else can. There are times when no one else is available, but I can talk to God at any time. When I have burdens too personal to share with others, I can take them to God. If it takes me a long to time work through or explain those burdens, God patiently listens. I may fear that another friend will grow weary of listening to another burden, or to the same burden again, but I don’t have that fear with God. I am afraid that other friends will pull away from me if I am too needy or too consumed by troubles, but I never have that fear with God. I worry that other friends will become annoyed if I try to spend too much time with them, but God always desires to spend even more time with me. Truly there is no other friend like Him.

That statement is not “sour grapes.” When other friends disappoint me, hurt me, or seem to disappear, it is easy to respond to the premise of God as my best friend with a statement like, “He sure is. People are jerks.” That’s neither a proper response nor is it the point; God isn’t just better than people at their worst. He is a friend that surpasses all others even at their best.

Neither is the statement that God is my best friend a lack of appreciation for other friends. Friends, especially Christian ones, are a great gift from God. He has given those relationships within the church to be a blessing and an encouragement. We are to help and love one another. Those blessings are not to be taken lightly. I value other dear friends that God has given me, but there is no friend like Jesus.

“Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.” James 4:8a (NASB)